So, to atone for a dark, long-winded first post, here's a short, somewhat nonsensical one.
The following represents approximately four hours of screwing around a few months ago:
Oh, what I forgot to mention was that I just spent the evening researching the evolution of the Umlaut and the usage of diacritical marks in Dutch. I should probably have been doing homework (finishing the script for a film about France) but this was much more interesting.