Wednesday, October 04, 2006

slow...

I came home from seeing David today and already have to gear up for the quick part of my work week. I don't know yet when my next day off is, but I do know that I'm working 8-12 hour days the next 3 days. So I was feeling glum. I decided to watch veggie tales while quilting.

So that was fun, and I am cutting fabric. It's nice to cut because I get to look at it all, it's beautiful fabric, but one of my spiritual gifts is not painstakingly lining up corners with an eye for detail and precise measurement. And it's slow.

But I was cheering up by hearing about Little Joe, a cowboy who is cheated over and over but, through a knack for dreams, organizational skills, and faith in God, ends up reconciling with his eleven brothers and being reunited with his father and saving the whole countryside from famine. But he had to go through tough times, when he doubted whether God was going to follow through on the dream promise.

And I had the thought: I will love having this fabric all cut into shapes so that I can lay them out and do the fun part, designing the quilt pattern. I will get to use the triangles and squares like a brush and paint, and paint out my vision, the vision I've been working on for months. But I have to do this part in order to have that part.

And, waitressing does not use too too many of my spiritual gifts. But, waitressing is allowing me to get to know Luke, live with my family, experience the place they are having their lives in, and it is also allowing me to finance travel within Latin America next year.

In the meantime, I should be the author of myself as Sue Monk Kidd encourages, finding my own power and "author" ity within myself as I embrace my creative and spiritual core and embody that spirituality. And in the meantime, I should watch for the ways God is being faithful to me in this lifestyle that I am not comfortable in. Emails from friends, friendly gestures from Idahoans, biking to work, sun on the mountains, etc.

Dear God, please be with me through the next three days.
Amen.

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